For some reason, adjectives have been on my heart a lot lately. Now, I know what you’re thinking, “adjectives? As in descriptive words?” Yes – adjectives. During a recent conversation with my friends, somehow we started talking about how one of my friends saw me and I couldn’t help but disagree… I didn’t see myself at all the way they saw me (in the certain scenario at hand). Then, the next day in the women’s Bible study I go to, we were reading a verse from the Bible that talked about a “wise woman.” The verse did not mention her name or any other thing about her besides that she was wise. We were talking about why she was only portrayed as wise and how that affects the story or even how it would affect her. Then I asked the question of whether or not she saw herself as wise, or was it only the people who saw her as such? Then, another question followed… if there were one word that could be used to describe you, one adjective, what would it be? How would the word you give yourself compare to the word others give you?
We all have had to think of ways to describe ourselves, whether it’s through those annoying ice-breakers we’re required to do in class or an assignment that our junior English teacher makes us do (that we also never finish). The point is, at one time or another, you’ve had to think of words that you would attach to yourself. But if you had to choose just one, and that word had to be your identifier, what would it be? We all care about what other’s think of us to some extent (whether you’re willing to admit it or not) and chances are you want the way others see you to match up with how you see yourself. After all, psychologically speaking, we all have a real-self (the way we actually are) and an ideal-self (the way we want to be/be seen). The question is, do yours line up?
I don’t think mine do – at least not all the time. But I think the whole point of growing as a person is trying to become a better version of yourself – one that lines up with who you want to be and how you want others to see you. I don’t think changing is the hard part. I think accepting the fact that you actually want to change is what’s hard. We all get so used to this idea of accepting ourselves as we are and that’s great because we should accept ourselves, but don’t let that stop you from always trying to be a better person than you were yesterday. Don’t stop thinking about what you want your word (your identifier) to be and striving to make that true. Never get so comfortable with yourself that you stop thinking of more – that you stop thinking of better adjectives.